Does worrying about your child keep you up at night?
Does your child have trouble focusing and seem distracted?
Is it difficult for your child to make connections with their kids their age
Do you find yourself confused by your child’s behaviors because one second they seems fine, and the next they are melting down?
Has your child described experiencing vivid and terrifying dreams?
Watching your child struggle behaviorally, emotionally, academically, or socially is a painful thing for a parent. When your child is struggling, it makes everything feel hard. From getting ready for school in the morning to doing their school work during the day. Even their favorite after school activities become a chore. When life feels hard, children start to act unpredictably seemingly fine one minute to being tearful or full of rage in the next. This isn’t just hard for the children either. When your child starts crying in the middle of the morning rush or explodes at the end of the day, it can be aggravating. With time, these experiences can change the dynamics of your relationship.
Life Can be Hard for Kids, Too
As hard as it can be to think about it, mental health concerns impact our children too. One in 6 children between the ages of 2-8 years old (17%) has been diagnosed with a mental, behavioral, or developmental disorder. Approximately 4.4 million children between the ages of 3 and 17 have been diagnosed with anxiety and 1.9 million with depression (CDC).
Something else that isn’t often talked about is the significant overlap in symptoms between children who suffer from anxiety, depression, ADHD, and trauma. Inattentiveness, physical restlessness, and behaviors that seem impulsive to adults are all symptoms of these diagnoses. It takes a skilled therapist to get to the root of the symptoms and find the most effective interventions.
As adults, we might yearn for childhood, remembering a time before responsibilities but growing up is actually really hard. Little people are filled with emotions, but lack understanding and language to communicate those feelings. Sorting out all of those feelings while also having very little power or control can result in big feelings. One kid might lash out in anger while another child might withdraw from their peers or family and become isolated. By helping kids understand their emotions- both big and small- we can give them the language they need to communicate effectively.
Therapy Can Help Your Child
All children experience times when they are stressed or overwhelmed by confusing emotions, but kids are also really resilient. With the right supports, they can better understand their experiences and learn to communicate their feelings and advocate for their needs in appropriate ways. When your child participates in therapy with me, you get a professional with a solid understanding of child development, and someone skilled a weeding through the symptoms to understand the root of the problem. I can help you, and your child understand the meaning of their symptoms and the best way to approach a situation to find a more relaxed space.
Because each child and situation is different, the way I do therapy will be tailored to each child. Here are some things that you can expect: The first session is 90 minutes, adults-only session. During this time, we complete a detailed intake that includes family history, explores the child’s development, and dives deep into your concerns. This allows you to release all the information, stress, and worry you have been holding without having to worry about your child overhearing or being judged.
The next few sessions will be a time for assessing the situation. I might ask you to do some activities with your child. Or your child and I might spend some time getting to know each other while you complete a questionnaire. I often use surveys to give us a second references point and a baseline understanding for later comparison. Once I have gotten a chance to get to know your child, we will have another adult-only meeting to go over my impressions and create a plan.
The format and structures of sessions depend on the goals. With young children, I may ask parents to stay in the room. I love working with young children, but they do require some extra creativity. Their ability to understand these concepts takes time and practice. Parents are the best resource for helping children thrive because you are the expert on your child. I count on parents to take the concepts we work on in treatment and practice them at home. If an hour a week of therapy helps, think how much one hour a day of therapeutic practice can be!
I generally meet with older kids individually. Kids are often people pleasers and really want to make their parent happy. Others don’t feel like they can be as open about their feelings when parents are around. We will make a plan after the assessment period about what the structure of sessions will look like. When beneficial, I will give suggestions for parents, and older children work together in-between sessions to get the most benefit from the work happening in sessions.
As a family systems therapist and a play therapist, I use a lot of play activities and symbolism in therapy to bring awareness to how the world around us impacts the client and how the client impacts the world. One day we might explore what it means to have power and control by acting out a scene where a robber steals something important. In a different session, we might ponder how we are complicated like a thistle plant- sharp and prickly, with a beautiful bloom! In addition to using symbolism, I also use play to teach skills. We could blow bubbles as a way to explore mindful breathing. Paint and a salad spinner provide the perfect opportunity to explore how complicated feelings can be.
As a Registered Play Therapist and Infant-Preschool Specialist, I have trained for 15 years to help your family. By including your child in therapy, you will help your child build confidence and resilience.
But Maybe You Still have questions about Child Therapy
My child does not like to talk about these problems. How will you get them to talk?
I don’t actually need your child to talk to help them to feel better. I spent my career training as a play therapist because play is the most meaningful way for kids to learn, experiment, and grow. Children show us through their play what we need to know about their feels, and struggle. I then continue to use play to them them understand and master new skills. When kids are ready to transition to using their voice to talk about their feelings, I bring in my ‘co-therapist’ in the form of animals and plants. Animal Assisted Therapy and Horticultural therapies help people, your child included, regulate their emotions. They provide a safe space for kids to practice sharing their feelings with little worry about shame, judgment, and disappointing people. Children are able to experiment and safely build those skills.
I have heard that therapy is expensive, and it takes a lot of time. Will this be worth it?
The great thing about treatment for kids is that the return on investment is enormous. Young kids are generally pretty open to shifting their mindset. They want to feel better, and with the right guidance, they can make meaningful shifts much more quickly than adults. By helping them have a healthy mindset, you give them a secure base from which to grow and be resilient. The skills they learn in therapy as a child stays with them forever. They may need a ‘tune-up’ every now and then to apply the skills to a new developmental stage, but the foundation stays strong. Life becomes a little lighter for these kids as they do better in family, social, and educational relationships.
The benefits here are not just for the kids either. Parents often report that they feel better knowing that someone is helping support their child. It feels great to see your child shift from struggling to finding their stride. By taking that stress and worry off your plate, you open up space to have a different relationship with your child- one that is filled with confidence and joy.
How will I know what is happening during the session?
In our first session, before I even meet the child, we will discuss and create a plan for your involvement. The amount and level of engagement can vary greatly depending on the age of the child and individual concerns. Most of my child clients are between the ages of 2-10. The younger the child, the more parental involvement that will be needed. As children get older, they often require more space from their parent to be able to explore their feelings.
You will still be involved, but it looks different. Most commonly, we use the last 5 minutes to check-in. My goal is to work toward having your child tell share with you what they got out of session. Until they are ready, I will lead those discussions.
You Child Can Thrive
And I am here to help. Through play and experiencing activities, your child can learn to understand and regulate their emotions, which will result in them feeling confident and secure. When you are ready to change the way your child thrives, contact me to schedule a free 30-minute consultation.
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